A Natural Blonde
I’m a natural blonde. I was born that way. Pictures of me growing up show me with straight blonde hair. Over the years, I’ve tried to hide it at times, pretending to be something I wasn’t, with red hair, or brown hair, or for a while navy hair. It’s been many different styles from ‘Pob’ to what my mother calls ‘Afghan Hound’. But underneath it all I’ve always known I have been blonde. Its part of me. Literally from my roots. Blonde. It’s taken me a long time to embrace the blonde, to be quite proud of it.
Everyone knows it’s a natural part of me. It’s never stopped me getting a job. No one has ever turned me away from a shop because of it, or refused to serve me in a bar or a pub. I haven’t been told I am wrong for loving another blonde and none of my partners have ever been told they are wrong for loving me. And if I was, imagine the uproar. Being blonde is part of my very being, it is how I was born. I haven’t been turned away from serving my country because I’m blonde.
So can someone please explain to me why being gay is any different. I mean I’m quite easily confused, but why is something as natural as loving someone, seen as wrong.
While I’m at it, can someone explain to me why it’s anybody’s business what sex someone identifies as, apart from that person. I place so many things so far above gender in my ‘what I think of a person’ rating. Are they kind? Are they loyal? Are they caring? We are meant to be in a place where it doesn’t matter if you are male or female it’s the best person for the job. That’s what feminists fight for. And yet there are feminists who think they have a right to define what a woman is. As I see it, and it is just my opinion, it’s none of your business. We never hear ‘That person has had a nose job, they can’t come in here’. It’s worth pointing out that for the last 20 years the vast majority of people refer to me as Leni. Not only a ‘male’ name but one I chose for myself. I know…stone me now.
It’s been 50 years since the Stonewall riots today. 50 years since trans people, lesbians, gay men and bisexuals stood up and resisted violence that they had been used to day in day out. 50 years. We have seen advances in technology, medicine and every aspect in life and yet still people are stigmatised and suffer prejudice because of who they choose to love. Now given some of my choices in men over the previous few years (present OH excluded clearly) I could understand it if people decided not to spend time with me because of my partners, but that’s got nothing to do with their gender, more to do with them just being deeply unpleasant.
Pride this year has reiterated that the first Pride was a protest. And that it still is. We should be ashamed. We should be ashamed that Pride is still needed to protest for gay rights. For human rights.
But while people like me, white, middle-class and straight, who have no real clue about discrimination, sit around doing nothing, don’t comment and don’t stand with people who are being discriminated against. Whilst we say we should have a straight Pride. Every day is Straight Pride day, every day we can walk down the street without fear, whilst we can display affection with the person we love, whilst we can swim where we want, then every day is Straight Pride
So today I say, out loud. I walk with you, I support you, and I am here for you. If you need me call. Whether you know me or not. If you want someone to go to an appointment with you, support you, heck if you fancy a coffee and a natter cos it’s a Friday. I don’t care who you love, (hell some of my closest friends are Westlife fans) and how you choose to identify yourself is really of no concern of mine except to make sure that I am using the correct pronoun.
And if I lose a little business because people don’t want someone involved in their wedding, or their naming ceremony, or their funeral who supports gay rights..sorry human rights….I’m probably not the celebrant for you.